friendship

My friend Juli sent me this story and I think it's great!!!!!


Friendship Choices

By Lysa TerKeurst

 

But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.” Ruth 1:16 (NIV)

 

Devotion:

“I want to quit school!” Oh such delightful words to hear from my twelve-year-old. Growing up is hard to do, especially in those ‘tween years. It turned out my daughter was having problems with her girlfriends. One of her friends had made plans with Hope and then cancelled when a more appealing offer came along from another girl. To me it seemed like a simple sign of immaturity on her friend’s part. But to Hope, it was devastating. So, I hugged her, prayed with her and gave her some tips on dealing with friends when they hurt your feelings.

 

A few days later she got in the car after school and said, “Mom, I’ve decided you have a choice with your friends. You can either deal with their quirks or stop hanging around them.”

 

I replied back, “Hope, that is profound wisdom. If you can remember that piece of relationship advice it will serve you well not just for the middle school years but on into your adult friendships as well.”

 

Do you ever find yourself struggling in your friendships and ponder how you can change those things about your friends that annoy you? Well, changing someone else is nearly impossible and very frustrating. Maybe we would do well to take the focus off of changing this other person and on improving ourselves. Making this subtle shift will allow real progress. Because while you can’t change the way someone else acts and reacts, you can control yourself. Make sure that your actions and reactions are honoring to God and reflecting the types of friendship qualities that you long for in a friend. After all, if we want a really good friend, we have to be a really good friend.

 

Once you’ve determined to make positive changes in yourself, pray for that friend that has qualities that are less than desirable. Chances are she has a lot of great qualities that you can choose to focus on. Praise God for her good qualities and mentally hand over each thing troubling you in your friendship. God will either give you the patience to love her despite your differences or He will show you how to create a healthy distance that will serve you both well.

 

Dear Lord, thank you for the precious gift of friendship. Help me to see and appreciate my friend’s good qualities without getting caught up and frustrated with her negative qualities. Lord, give me wisdom to know when to draw boundaries in my friendships and how to choose my friends wisely. My heart desires friendships that characterized by your love. Help me to be the kind of friend I long to have. Thank you for friends with whom I can laugh, learn and journey through life. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.